Teen girls need help. As the pandemic surges, one thing is for sure. Many teen girls are isolated, lonely, withdrawn, and anxious. The phone has the ability to keep girls connected. However, with nothing going on in the day to day life, it can feel like a waste of time to communicate with friends. Unfortunately, authentic connection tapers off as we come to nearly a year of the pandemic life.
The Down Side For Teen Girls
This decline in connection is a down side for sure. Teen development involves a transition to a strong importance and value in friendships. Not seeing one another day to day is putting a dent in their development. The ability to make new friends and expand her social network is not there. Even if she goes to school in a hybrid model, masks are covering up the social cues inviting someone to start a conversation. The subtle cues of a mouth turned upward can make or break whether to talk to one another. Unfortunately, this covering up is leading to further isolation.
In fact, one of my former high school classmates, who is now a high school principal in the Midwest, posted on Facebook recently. He shared it being the quietest lunch period he’d ever seen when his students returned back to school. This post devastated me. As someone who has a passion for helping girls grow and live their best lives, a quiet lunch period is the opposite of what I’d hope for. I’d want teens to have the freedom to talk, smile, laugh, be together, and really connect. Instead, many teens feel more anxious and uncertain.
Then there are the many teens opting for online school, so they can avoid the anxiety and dwell in the lonely but comfortable confines of their rooms. This can be dangerous territory. Avoiding what we are anxious about only further feeds anxiety. I am very concerned about teens who are not choosing school due to anxiety. I’m not saying online school is always a bad choice. However, when it comes to refusing school due to anxiety, one might want to take a closer look. Avoiding what we fear can lead to short term relief but create a longer term problem. Teen girls need help in working through anxiety.
The Up Side For Teen Girls
Now that I’ve shared my concerns, let me turn towards offering girls and parents some hope. The fact is, many girls are resilient. They work through challenges the pandemic has posed. Having experiences building resilience and making it through tough stuff can serve our girls well. As we know, life isn’t all roses. Having experiences of working through hard times can empower us that when times get hard again, we can make it through.
Another area of hope is families have gotten closer. I hear great stories of siblings hanging together as a result of not having a heavy schedule with all hours accounted for. Family movie night, game nights, and meals with everyone sitting down together is a thing many family’s never had before. Due to the heavy demands of sports, activities, and building that impressive college resume kept family connection at bay. Families can be of great help to their teen girl during this time.
A third area of hope is many teens have used the online space as a tool to make, keep, and connect with friends and have experiences. Many parents feel phones are detrimental to their daughter’s mental health. However, it’s actually a positive tool when used with awareness about when enough is enough. Meaning, when girls can tell their online interactions aren’t helping them to feel good about themselves, and they make a conscious choice to disconnect from their device. The ability to disconnect is a powerful tool to have and one we want teen girls to understand and implement.
Resources For Girls
Lastly, there is hope from the many programs offering help for teen girls by creating healthy connections and experiences online. The world is changing and so is how we are reaching teens. A quick google search will lead to a host of online wellness programs for our girls, including Wise Girl Workshops, Girls on the Run for younger teens, Girl Scouts, and Black Girls Code. Girl coaching is also a great option for girls wanting to work on specific goals.
Like most things in life, there are up sides and down sides. There is loneliness, and there is also opportunity for connection and growth. There is anxiety, and there is the ability to grow confidence. Our girls can do some of it on their own. They also need adult support to help them through these tough times. You can be that help for your teen girl.
ge on Unsplash
Teen girls need help. As the pandemic surges, one thing is for sure. Many teen girls are isolated, lonely, withdrawn, and anxious. The phone has the ability to keep girls connected. However, with nothing going on in the day to day life, it can feel like a waste of time to communicate with friends. Unfortunately, authentic connection tapers off as we come to nearly a year of the pandemic life.
The Down Side For Teen Girls
This decline in connection is a down side for sure. Teen development involves a transition to a strong importance and value in friendships. Not seeing one another day to day is putting a dent in their development. The ability to make new friends and expand her social network is not there. Even if she goes to school in a hybrid model, masks are covering up the social cues inviting someone to start a conversation. The subtle cues of a mouth turned upward can make or break whether to talk to one another. Unfortunately, this covering up is leading to further isolation.
In fact, one of my former high school classmates, who is now a high school principal in the Midwest, posted on Facebook recently. He shared it being the quietest lunch period he’d ever seen when his students returned back to school. This post devastated me. As someone who has a passion for helping girls grow and live their best lives, a quiet lunch period is the opposite of what I’d hope for. I’d want teens to have the freedom to talk, smile, laugh, be together, and really connect. Instead, many teens feel more anxious and uncertain.
Then there are the many teens opting for online school, so they can avoid the anxiety and dwell in the lonely but comfortable confines of their rooms. This can be dangerous territory. Avoiding what we are anxious about only further feeds anxiety. I am very concerned about teens who are not choosing school due to anxiety. I’m not saying online school is always a bad choice. However, when it comes to refusing school due to anxiety, one might want to take a closer look. Avoiding what we fear can lead to short term relief but create a longer term problem. Teen girls need help in working through anxiety.
The Up Side For Teen Girls
Now that I’ve shared my concerns, let me turn towards offering girls and parents some hope. The fact is, many girls are resilient. They work through challenges the pandemic has posed. Having experiences building resilience and making it through tough stuff can serve our girls well. As we know, life isn’t all roses. Having experiences of working through hard times can empower us that when times get hard again, we can make it through.
Another area of hope is families have gotten closer. I hear great stories of siblings hanging together as a result of not having a heavy schedule with all hours accounted for. Family movie night, game nights, and meals with everyone sitting down together is a thing many family’s never had before. Due to the heavy demands of sports, activities, and building that impressive college resume kept family connection at bay. Families can be of great help to their teen girl during this time.
A third area of hope is many teens have used the online space as a tool to make, keep, and connect with friends and have experiences. Many parents feel phones are detrimental to their daughter’s mental health. However, it’s actually a positive tool when used with awareness about when enough is enough. Meaning, when girls can tell their online interactions aren’t helping them to feel good about themselves, and they make a conscious choice to disconnect from their device. The ability to disconnect is a powerful tool to have and one we want teen girls to understand and implement.
Resources For Girls
Lastly, there is hope from the many programs offering help for teen girls by creating healthy connections and experiences online. The world is changing and so is how we are reaching teens. A quick google search will lead to a host of online wellness programs for our girls, including Wise Girl Workshops, Girls on the Run for younger teens, Girl Scouts, and Black Girls Code. Girl coaching is also a great option for girls wanting to work on specific goals.
Like most things in life, there are up sides and down sides. There is loneliness, and there is also opportunity for connection and growth. There is anxiety, and there is the ability to grow confidence. Our girls can do some of it on their own. They also need adult support to help them through these tough times. You can be that help for your teen girl.
