As my 8th grade daughter bustled around the house getting ready for Halloween at school with her curly-haired wig bobby pinned to her head, my oldest daughter came into the kitchen. She said to me, “Mom, I wish I had that much confidence as an eighth grader!”
I smiled at this compliment as I remember all the work my youngest daughter has done over this last year to boost her self-esteem and confidence.
The Importance of Awareness
This summer she volunteered at our Wise Girl summer camps for younger grades. This experience really brought awareness into her life around the challenges she feels from being shy. During her time at camp, she saw just how shy she can be with people she doesn’t know. She also reflected on herself with her past lacrosse teams. She often found it hard to find her voice and connect with new people causing her to feel left out.
Lastly, she went on our Wise Girl Adventure to Point Reyes Nation Sea Shore where she saw her shy self emerge. It was in that experience, with all the reflection she had done this summer, that she consciously decided she was going to put herself out there more. At one point early on in the trip, she quietly pulled me aside. She told me she was noticing herself pulling inward and that she was going to bring herself out. Which is exactly what she did and ended up having an amazing time!
Which leads into this fall, where she’s decided she wants to show up in another way. And my older daughter’s recognition is a sign of just how far she is coming.
Transforming Shyness
From having the confidence to wear this costume in her GIANT middle school to showing up on her new lacrosse team and making a real effort to get to know her new teammates by chatting it up at the team dinner, my girl is growing.
Now if you know my daughter well, you might not see this shy side of her. Because when she’s comfortable, you’ll get the funny, fun, and bold kid. However, in those uncomfortable, unknown experiences, historically she bows down and feels disconnected as a result.
But now, she has much more awareness under her belt. As mother-daughter, we’ve spent time talking about what she wants. I’ve carefully shared my observations and inquired about her desires for herself. She’s been able to answer honestly and has had many opportunities to work through her shyness and find more happiness in herself and her world.
And what can I say? I’m proud! In fact, this is what I feel when I see other Wise Girls make this transformation.
How This Change Shows Up At Wise Girl Workshops
Being with girls for many weeks and years allows me the opportunity to really get to know our participants. In our workshop spaces, I not only nurture their growth but support them in bringing awareness into their lives, accepting themselves as they are, and becoming who they want to be. Whether that’s being a good friend, more outspoken, or brave, we help girls grow.
My girl is just an example of what is possible!
Here’s to growing Wise Girls!
Resources
If you want to learn more about our programs to support your daughter’s growth, then please head to our Workshops and Services page. In addition, if you are looking for resources on working with shyness, check out the article on 8 Tips for Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness.
